2019. One Hit Wonder, One Night Stand

but read and listen to music tracks for full experience.

[* links in article will makes sense of rude boy and analogies]

If it was good, they will wonder.💫2019 is the year of SEXY.

No he didn’t spend the night because assholes don’t spend the night. It was 4am and it started to pour rain. I always wonder in this beautiful city of LA filled the millions of stories and a collection of people, why is it I’m the only one who’ll run in the rain? By legend, not only does it rain just once a year, but for the first time in a stretch it fucking poured real water. He snuck out my front door without saying bye and when I heard the door shut that it, that hopeful feeling of being wanted faded. I ran for my light and by the end of that run I knew I had made the most out of what the universe just gave me – with the rain and him. Like the end of the new year, when I know it’s over and I wish I could have done it different, it’s always devastating, but then my heart speaks to me and tells me to get up and just go.

Up until this month I had numbed out. 2018? Did that happen? I couldn’t bring myself to write or to feel anything for months. I was completely speechless. If you asked me, “What do you think, Melanie?” I’d try to talk and get frustrated as to why I frankly felt dumb. I felt nothing. The only one I could talk to was someone I’ve never met in person, a struggling semi-prostitute in New York City who had been living in her car. Maybe weird, but I’d rather be that- weird.🤪

What if you could look back at each year, each non-hit asshole, each sloppy one night stand, and each fuck-up as simply a one hit wonder? How can you make the most out of one hit? 🔂

When you hear a one hit wonder song, you don’t think,

“Dam, that’s a one hit wonder. That artist fucked up.”

Na, you roll your windows down and you fuck wit it. The phrase I learned in 2018 is

“I fuck wit chu.”

It means that you’re on the same frequency as someone and to put it simply you’re saying “I really fuckin like you.”

Fuck wit this.👊🏾Ru Bradford

This track goes with the feeling of this article. Listen. Feel.

One Hit Wonder Track: Mark Morrison, Return of the Mack

If you have momentary success, the only way to make that a hit is you gotta go all the way, you can’t be an

An ish is someone who sucks. They don’t care about anyone else’s time or energy accept for their own. An ish is a maybe, a probably not, a person who chases right when they realize they’re about to lose out. They dispose of others and opportunities often. If you’re going to fuck up, don’t fuck up-ish. If you want to be known for something, know no one remembers an ish. Commit. An ish will have tall-tale stories of the almost. How exciting. We should approach one hits as really good songs. Sometimes you don’t get another chance, but that’s why you have to hit it out of the park when you feel it, that it right in front of you. Always be over-the-fence home run romantic with yourself and everything you do. That saying, “hit it and quit it” doesn’t even make sense. If you quit it, then you never really hit it because you didn’t want it that bad and that just makes you a quitter. A quitter is someone who wanted it-ish. You are what you do.

To the rude boy that fooled me thrice☝🏾✌🏾🤟🏾, you’re fool-ish and self-ish and shame on me. 

If you think about it, each year is a one hit wonder.

It happens and then it’s over and then you wonder. As we reach the end of 2018 all I’m wondering about is if I am an ish because nothing really fell through and that’s my fault. It’s now a recorded track no one will ever playback unless I can find a way to remix mashup it with some B.I.G. Love. If music is love, then each year should be looked at as love because you lived and that’s beautiful. Play your jam, no one likes songs about being perfect anyway.

You’ve got one chance to make the best of each day before the year is over and most of us kidz of the The Last Generation will wonder,

“What the fuck am I doing with my life?,”

then get over it until next New Year’s Eve.🎉It was all a blur-ish.

When the clock strikes midnight and you’re blitzed by tradition of finding a non-hit to suck face with, how often do you think, “Look what the fuck I did with my life this year? I’m so fucking proud of myself? Fuck yeah 2018?” Those question marks are there for a reason. This year, don’t just kiss a non-hit, fucking kiss that one-hit! If you’re going to swap spit with a stranger, make it count. Make everything count.

Cheers!🥂 You will never get 2018 back. Did you hit it, you know, the ball when it dropped? The real question is, if you hit, how many times? In baseball and hockey the term, “a cup of coffee” is used to describe a short stint. The players last long enough to sippy-sip on some smooth cold brew, but there’s no refills for them. Did they play game right? Did they not practice enough? Or maybe, just maybe they simply weren’t good enough. There’s a lot of coffee shops with better coffee. We think of these players as failures, but in reality they won the fucking lottery. How many people can say, “I got paid to play, even if it was just once?” You’ve lived through the most photogenic apocalyptic year of humanity destructive instagram hoe’s and watching your own stories on repeat; how fortuitous. Are you still in the game or did your drip run low?

I’m never good enough. 2018 was the year of “I didn’t” and in fact the #trending term was “I can’t even…”  In the beginning of the year everyone was dancing to my track and it’s not that they got tired of it, I did. I went into the year ready for doors to open. I knocked politely, but that’s just not me – polite. I can’t even begin to describe how polite I was this year… My 2018 one-hit would have the lyrics “please and thank you” and “I’m sorry for doing nothing”… Yeah I don’t remember how the rest of how the song goes either.

Chapter – A one night stand = One hit wonder

One Hit Wonder Track: The Temper Trap, Sweet Disposition

In the nick of time, the door that opened just once-ish this year was my vagina.

For men, they probably approach a one night stand like a really good one hit wonder. When it plays, they remember it or her. They might think, “Ohhhh yeahhhhh.” They’ll look back, remember the beats she moved to, and wonder just long enough until the next track plays.➪ For women, possibly fortunate, one hits are unforgettable. I don’t care how many women pretend it’s just a hook-up, it’s not because it’s not in a woman’s DNA to forget how any man made her feel. There’s no such thing as meaningless sex; even the word meaningless has meaning. Most likely when the song no longer plays on the radio (if that still exists) a women will wonder… and if she doesn’t, then she’s officially learned how to be an asshole and congratulations, she’s the fortunate one. I’m learning shitbag 2018 is going to end on a very high note with this asshole of an article.

Although I’ve never had a one night stand, I feel like I did and even thinking about it makes me feel worthless. Yes I’m deathly frightened of STDs, but I just don’t have it in me to not wonder after. It doesn’t turn me on knowing I’d never see someone again. If you are what you do, then allowing someone to use me for just one night or two says too much. I wish I were more selfish that way I could get what I want out of a man and I’m working on it. However, recently what brought me back to feeling shit and got me up running for my light was a man who made me feel like shit and for that I’m grateful. He hit it once-ish and going forward all I’m going to give him is wonder, and he’s lucky to even have that. To spare the details, he made me feel like I wasn’t enough, completely took advantage of me to say the least, had no interest in who I was, never cared to ask about The Last Generation , and in the end after giving more than I have given to anyone in years over the course of a few months I just feel ashamed and I want what I gave back. My ass was his only interest, so here’s my ass, take a look buddy. He might as well as hit it and quit it, he’s what I imagine an asshole one night stand would feel like. To be completely honest, it feels even worse because it wasn’t a one night stand. I was so hard on myself after, I felt like I had hurt myself, like I had destroyed everything I’ve fought so hard for. My girl Stephanie said,

“Have it be a thing you did for you because it felt good for you instead of something you did for him. Overall. Not just the sex but the effort of really opening up to someone over the course of months. You haven’t let anyone in years.”

It’s true, my intentions were honest and I’m looking for love like everyone else who’s open to it. He just ended up being a cup of coffee, a really good looking cup of coffee. ☕️If I were to have closed my eyes, taken away the shiny mug and the cool digs and then taken a sip, I would have known early on that there wasn’t much quality to the bay area roast.🌉I thought it was me, that my senses were off, but each time I tried to discover his origins nothing turned up organic. The only conversation that I remember sounded like “ish.” Sometimes you just want a little pep from your cup of coffee, but maybe he was expired. 

Sure I’ll wonder about him because that’s what I do, I never forget anyone or anything ever but thank you, next. He is my one hit wonder of 2018. 👋🏾I doubt I’ll be rollin my windows down to his track, but if it plays on the random I’ll remember that great run I had in the rain and how sometimes it takes an asshole to remind me that I deserve so much more🌧🔥. I guess that’s why Taylor Swift will never be a one hit wonder; she dates too many assholes. When you hear a one hit wonder, your reflexes remind you of how you felt the first time you listened to it. Although not easy, if you can find a way to grow from an asshole one night stand then eventually your reflexes will strengthen to a point where you can’t be fucked with again and soon you’ll be ghostwriting for Cardi B!👻

TLG👁 is my rap song, my album. Be careful with me, it’s not a threat it’s a warning. I’ll keep echoin’ my beats even after one hits. 

I’d like to look back at my experience with this person, with this asshole and this year like this one profound one hit wonder by Eamon. Fuck it, I don’t want him or 2018 back.

One Hit Wonder Track: Eamon, Fuck It

The apocalypse sure is photogenic. When rude boys and can’t even hoe’s are tryin to kiss you into 2019, take a photo, post it on yo IG and remember that one time… it’s the only time you’re gonna get. Plus without a cute pic, eventually they’ll fade into background-ish.

Moral of the Story

Keep expanding. A good one hit is unforgettable and that’s something to be proud of. If it was good, they will wonder.

When it’s fading, get up. Go. Run for your light.

No one remembers an ish.

What goes on instagram is seen.

One night stands are like one hit wonders; something to wonder about for 2 minutes and 3o seconds.

He was just a cup of coffee, that’s it.

You are what you do.

My New Years Resolution

Maybe this is my becoming of a butt girl. I decided that if I was going to film my ass, I had to make sure it made you want to hit it. 😉

In 2017 I worked on loving myself (not easy), in 2018 I worked on loving others (not easy), and in 2019 I am going to work on MY SEXY (and that’s just not easy either). I am sexy and I’ve tried to get by without playing the game, but I play better than anyone out there. How else did I get you to click on this article? Get ready.

I love you and thanks for making 2018 a hit-ish.

P.S. How do you know they’re one hits? Always time for a come back.🐇

Update – Ru Bradford

That Rude boy doesn’t even deserve to be called a one hit wonder. Thanks to instagram and friendly lurkers👀, I learned he has a full on girlfriend and lied to manipulate and pressure me into having sex with him. He hid photos he was tagged in, but what people old geezers don’t realize is that what’s posted on instagram is seen by everyone and I see everything.👁He slept with me while he was house sitting his girlfriend’s house and watched her dog. It now all makes sense why he left at 4am without saying bye and when I asked him about it he couldn’t even comprehend that in any way that this was wrong. There’s many words for people like him but one word is sociopath. When I confronted him, with a lack of conscience or care of how deeply violated I felt, it fell on deaf ears. Will keep it classy here. I don’t even need to say what he is, ya’ll already know. The hardest part is I’m the one that feels the shame and it breaks me up inside. I’ll be working on this. If the tables were turned on a woman and I was 15 years older than someone and did what he did, I’d be considered a loser. 👁 When I asked him what would he tell his actual real daughter that he actually has if this were to have happened to her he said, “I’d tell her that’s dating.” Well all I can say is, then don’t date a writer.👊🏾

Thankfully there are so many other coffee shops.👋🏾I’ll take the fresher younger organic brew, please and thank you.🔂

Love

After 9 years of some of the best conversations I’ve ever had with someone, Allie Krumdawg Millionaire, thank you for always opening your doors, holding me up, and never judging me. I wouldn’t have you any other way. I love you. And that was the best fucking New Years kiss of my life!💋

Don’t be RUde. Subscribe.

melanie me blanchard gong, writer of the last generation thelastgen magazine creative director ru bradford rudeboyphotos, sausalito, venice